The SWATCloud

Where does it go? The weight; when one loses it, where exactly where does it go? I was told the weight goes to the same place as those threads from your socks, when you get a hole in them. I wish I had said that.

But I now know where it goes.

The I.T. Industry thinks it has come up with something new, with its fancy iCloud in hyperspace, but dream on geek boys, Mother Nature has beaten you to it. For thousands of years, hovering in our atmosphere is the SWAT cloud. It is made up of four storage banks: Strength, Weight, Appearance and Time

Strength: You have all heard it a million times; use it or lose it.

When you do strength training, you become stronger. Your body responds to the extra load that you put on it. By lifting heavier weights, or even some weight, you recruit more muscles and within a five week period you have noticeable strength gains. Everyday tasks become easier, you feel better, you walk tall, and life is good. But if you stop, you gradually become weaker; those strength gains will diminish over time. Where do they go? They go to the SWAT cloud; they just cannot disappear. They sit up there hovering, just waiting for you to start training again, to bring them back down.

Weight: The big one: literally. When somebody loses a lot of weight, we are all amazed. ‘Where does it go?’ everyone asks. Along with their friends, the strength gains, the weight joins them up in the SWAT cloud. But this particular storage bank, over the years, has developed a problem similar to someone with poor pelvic floor muscles; it can’t hold it all in, all of the time.

Due to global obesity and yoyo dieting, the weight storage bank has reached its capacity in available storage, but most importantly, has reached critical, saturated fat levels. It resembles the deep fryer in a fish and chip shop: a big, slimy vat of arterial-hardening goop. The excess kilograms that are not able to swim in the vat, try to cling to the side, but slowly slide off. This storage bank is the weakest link in a temporary holding facility. This is why 85% of people who choose to go on a fad diet and lose weight initially, will eventually go back to their original pre diet weight. The excess kilos lose their grip on the side of the vat and can just slip back down to earth, ever so easily.

Appearance: Everyone has a bad patch. Poor eating, too much booze, late nights, working too hard, no exercise. How do we feel? How do we look? Terrible, pasty, spotty, clogged, toxic….know the feeling? You look in the mirror and ask yourself, ‘Where did my good self go?’ SWAT cloud: Your good self is hovering up there in the cloud, being tempted to party with the strength gains and going for a dip in the vat with the fat. All you have to do is look after yourself; eat well, cut back on the turps, get to bed earlier and exercise. At least try to get two of these under control. Your body will love you; the SWAT cloud will then send your good self back down and you will feel a lot better and see a new person in the mirror.

Time: We were made to run. People, who run, become fitter and faster. Recreational runners will be able to tell you all about their personal best running times for certain distances. With dedication and consistency, they become faster; they shave minutes off their five, or ten kilometre run time. So where do those crucial seconds or minutes go? You guessed it; they sit up in the SWAT cloud with your temporarily lost strength, weight and good appearance. If your run training wanes, then those minutes will be sent back down, one by one, so your race time will be slower. This just doesn’t apply to running; everyday activities become faster and easier when we are fitter. Housework, gardening, playing with the kids….lose the fitness, and the time will come back down from the cloud. You will slow down: everyday activities will become harder.

So you can now see where it all goes. But you need to remember that the SWAT cloud is only a temporary storage facility. It doesn’t steal it from you; it just minds it, until you get your life under control.

.The SWAT cloud will always be there; there is nothing we can do to make it go away. We can however, work harder to keep our good health and well being, down here, on Terra Firma.

Your health and well-being are a constant work in progress.

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